Conversations with the Divine
I remember I was parked in front of a gas station in my old Ford Tempo- an inherited car.
I had pulled up to one of those quarter machines for vacuuming out your car. This was back in the days when I really didn’t have a whole lot of money and I’d already combed my car for loose change under the seats hoping to have enough to vacuum my car out. I’d managed to score a few quarters, and you would have thought I’d won the lottery.
I must tell you, my car was really dirty.
Just as I just slid my prized quarters into the machine to start vacuuming, I noticed a homeless-looking man sitting just over the hill.
He couldn’t have been more than 10 or 15 feet from me. He sat there quietly, with his brown paper bag next to him, a book resting on his lap. I was of course peeking back over my shoulder as I began to vacuum. I was a little paranoid.
I was going as fast as I could with that suction hose. I could feel the pressure of time ticking down on me, sweat dripping down my face. I was going like an Olympic Sprinter only to come to a screetching halt… my time had ran out. “Oh God- I’ve still got half a car to go.”
A man’s voice behind me said, “You run out of money?”
Startled, I replied, “Yea.”
“Well, down to your left. There’s a quarter on the ground.”
Sure enough, there it was. A quarter shining at me from the ground. I picked it up and skipped back over to the machine, yelling back, “Thank you!”
He replied, “Well, the universe does have a way of providing for us.”
I threw that quarter in the slot, and just as I was finishing the front seats… the hose turned off again. Shit, they never seem to give you enough time on those stupid machines. I had ran out of money again and I didn’t even get the back seats done. Well, I guess at least the front seats look good.
The man must have noticed my frustration and said, “You run out of money again Ma’am? You know, people are not very bright, and I’d bet you that if you looked on the top of that trash can, you’d find enough money.”
I thought to myself, “I am not digging in the trash! What? Are you crazy?” He must have sensed my hesitation because he said, “No, no really. Just pick that bag up and look.”
I hesitantly picked up the bag up and sure shit, there sat three old quarters on a piece of paper. It appeared as though someone had dumped out a tray of crumbs from their car. I was in no position to turn down the free money. “I’ve just gotta remember to wash my hands after this- who knows where those quarters have been.”
Luckily, that machine took those 3 dirty quarters just fine, and I was able to finish vacuuming the rest of my car.
I looked back up at the guy and h
e was just sitting there and smiling. He had such a beaming light behind his eyes, it’s hard to describe. I’m sure he could have used the money for himself, but instead, he was just so pleased to be able to help me find a dollar to vacuum my car. I said, “Thank you so much,” and headed to leave in my clean car.
He said, “You know, when you’re homeless, you learn a lot about people.”
I paused and asked him, “What are you reading?” He looked down and smiled, held up his tattered book and said, “I don’t know, I can’t read.”
He said, “Would you like to hear a story?” I knew I had to get going and pick up my two kids, but I agreed.
So he picked up his old book, held it in front of him and started with, “Once upon a time…”
I thought to myself, “If you can’t read, how can this guy be reading me something? He’s not even looking at the pages.” At first I wasn’t really listening to him at all, I was just in my head wondering about this weird situation I had found myself in. Not to mention the kids were inevitably waiting for me.
He paused and looked at me with a finger up to his mouth, “Shh…. your mind is way too loud.”
[Gulp] So I started listening… and I mean really listening.
The entire story he told me was about a journey of self-realization. He said, “The divine master is not anywhere but in you. It creates with you. It’s not in a church, it’s not in anything or anyone but yourself.”
The whole time I was standing there I didn’t hear him use the “G-o-d” word.
I had heard messages like this before from other teachers, as I had been searching for my own spiritual path for many years, but for whatever reason, him sitting there telling me this story resonated with me like no message ever had. For me, this was a moment with the divine. I realized that one true light consciousness, god, divine energy, whatever you call it, was speaking to me through him.
I tried to talk myself out of it of course, but I couldn’t escape the feeling I had. The book he was holding was dirty and upside down, and he wasn’t even reading from it. He had a pint of booze next to him, but seemed very sober and present. At this point he had stopped reading, and was looking me with those piercing eyes. He said, “If there’s anything I can teach you, never leave your life unsettled. Live every day like this is the only life you have. Don’t sit back and wait for it to get better. Make it better.”
I’ve never forgotten the feeling I had in this moment. As if I had been connected, plugged in for the first time.
And just then, out of the gas station stumbled a very intoxicated woman. “Are you ready to go?” she said. The man, now stumbling and in a groggy voice said, “Yea….”
I’m telling you, this was not the same man I had just spoken with.
He looked drunk and could hardly slur his words together. His face even looked different. He picked up his bottle and stumbled past me as if we had never spoken.
I stood there in shock, trying to wrap my mind around what had just happened. All I know is how incredibly grateful I felt as it made me aware of my own sobriety. As he vanished into his drunk state, I could still hear his voice ringing in my ears and I realized I had to hold something good for him. It was a sobering moment.
To this day, I’m not sure exactly what happened. Whether it was him having a lucid moment or not, it was a divine moment for me, and I was grateful for the message. Even when we’re at our most down moments, there’s always someone more down than us, and I have to work to be in my gratitude.
It was the exact message I needed to hear in that moment of searching, and I realized the divine can reach out and guide us in so many ways.
Divine is in the details. We just have to be open to seeing them.
I believe when we’re truly searching, the universe has a way of extending a hand and offering us the clarity we need. So whether or not my story resonates with you, I encourage you to be open to receiving your own messages in your life. Try not to judge how it’s being delivered to you. Just embrace it.
See the One True Light Consciousness, God, The Universe in everything.
Love & Light,
P.S. Pause and look for the messages around you. Journal them, write them down. They are sacred.